Sunday, May 10, 2009


Hi all,
I couldn't finish adjusting basic values on them, but I post these anyway to get some feedbacks before it's too late. For the interior, I forgot to put a bird in a cage, and there would be a lot of other cages in the back. I'll fix the perspective problems later.....before John sees this! The foreground of the forest is supposed to be a river. I haven't designed the flower yet, but I'm aiming for a rose-like flower.

I appreciate any advice. Thanks in advance. 

5 comments:

  1. Hey kanako, first of all, thanks for the valuable feedback. For your interior moment, are you going for a fish eye effect? If so, I feel that the right side, or cage stand would need to curve in slightly. Also, is she reacting, or surprised to see him entering because I don't quite feel that yet. It feels as though she is just doing her normal routine, and he enters before she realizes anything is happening. For your exterior shot, I really like having the root in the river. I think it would be nice to add water hitting against the root, causing resistance and splashing to help show the movement of the river. Also, I would add a few leaves at the top, and play with moss and what not, since the tree is a huge part of your composition, it might be nice to detail it. You could put a glow on the flower and it could still be a huge focal point. I hope this helps!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Kanako, I think that if you intend him to enters abruptly before she notice anything then I think the comp looks good to me. Im just not sure which character is your main emphasis. For the second piece, I like the staging and the design of your tree a lot. I was thinking that you can intensify the risk factor more by possibly have some water running beneath and through some of the roots. This he has to skip from roots to roots to get to the flower. I'm just throwing out an idea though. Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hey lady! I think your stuff looks great and I agree with the above crits. I was looking at the second comp and remembering that JP was encouraging people who chose that moment to up the interest by making it dangerous. I think it looks very elegant as it is, but maybe you can think of a way to make it a little more interesting. My initial inclination would be to have wolf eyes or something like that in the background, sort of foreshadowing a struggle for the flower and his life!! AHH! Okay, that was melodramatic; lol, anyway it's probably just personal preference, but I thought I would throw my idea into the universe to see what you thought of it. =)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hey Kanako! Really love the tree drawing and the composition! I can see the Rackham influence! I think his body language could be pushed more to show he is frightened or that it is scary. He seems kinda la-de-daing around the tree. The interior I couldn't really tell what was happening, maybe post a larger file so that we could see the details in the background?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Wow! Thank you very much everyone for thoughtful crits. I'll definitely address those points, and push the poses and the connection between the environment and the characters. (Perspective, too of course!) I'll also make the moment read clear.

    Thank you guys again for spending your precious time for me. :)

    ReplyDelete